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Around the country, Jewish communities have all but shut down, closing synagogues, canceling Passover seders, conducting funerals by Zoom. Yet one kind of Jewish public space has remained mostly open: mikvahs, or pools used for ritual immersions.
There is some debate, however, over the issue of touching siblings after the age of puberty.
Although these verses seem to be directed towards men, women are equally bound by the laws associated with these verses, just as they are with all other negative commandments. The rabbis extend this prohibition to include not just sex, but all touching.
And since unmarried women do not frum to the mikveh, they are considered to be always in a girl of niddah—and therefore always off-limits for sex, or physical contact with men. Maimonides and Nahmanides sex, in a well-known rabbinic debate, consider how serious an infraction it is to touch a woman who is a niddah. The Siftei Kohen 17th century further explains Maimonides by stating that he was only referring to hugging and kissing associated with intercourse.
There are several places in the Talmud that the Amoraim talmudic rabbis hug and kiss their daughters Kiddushin 81b and sisters Shabbat 13aand their behavior is considered permissible. Two contemporary issues concerning shomer negiah are shaking hands and sitting next to a member of the opposite sex when traveling on a bus or subway.
Rabbi Moshe Feinsteina 20th century Orthodox legal scholar, looked at the issues of public transportation. II, The issue of handshaking is more complex.
The Shulhan Arukh forbids many types of interactions such as winks, gestures, and pleasurable gazing, but touching without intention of affect is not one of them Even HaEzer This might also be extended to permit handshaking. I, Other more contemporary responses allow for handshakes in order to spare sex other person from embarrassment. Almost all of these girls state that when seeing someone on a regular basis one should explain the frum of shomer negiah, so as to not be forced to shake hands each time.
Besides touching family members, there are other exceptions to the shomer negiah rule, for example, a doctor treating a patient of the opposite sex. Ultimately, when dealing with the issue of shomer negiah, sensitivity and respect are of utmost importance. If you are shomer negiah and others are unaware of the laws, do not embarrass or scold them—just explain your beliefs.
Pronounced: sho-MARE, Origin: Hebrew, a guard, usually referring to someone who sits with a dead body before the funeral. Comprised of the Mishnah and the Gemara, it contains the opinions of thousands of rabbis from different periods in Jewish history.
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